The duties that Allah has prescribed for children require that the children also share in the sorrows of their parents
What are the rights of parents on children? We keep hearing this. And in the Qur'an and Hadith, we find a different description of the rights of parents. But what are the rights of children over parents? This is rarely heard. We will try to explain it here for the information of parents. What are the rights of children over their parents? Because Islam does not give one-sided rights to anyone. Rather, every human being has certain rights that are obligatory on others. And on the other hand there are some duties that others have to pay as rights. According to the same principle, children also have certain rights over parents. Those who are included in the duties of parents will be mentioned here.
Recognition of children's rights is also important for parents, so that from the beginning parents can arrange the payment of these rights of children. Because of not knowing otherwise, sometimes parents do not care to pay the actual rights of children. But out of love for their children, they arrange to give such things to them. Which may not be included in the responsibility of parents. For example, some rich parents try to give plots, houses and bank balances to their children. But no attempt is made to train them properly. And for this task, sometimes these parents are putting themselves in unnecessary trouble. And sometimes parents try to do all this with forbidden income.
Raising Children with Illicit Income
As a result of raising children with forbidden food and turning away from the original duty, the children later become disobedient. Fights start at home. And the parents start regretting saying that we have not done anything for our children, but they are giving us this reward in their old age. Yes, unfortunately, these parents did everything for their children that they shouldn't have done and didn't do what they should have done.
A famous case of parents who do not pay for their children's rights and the resulting disobedience of their children is mentioned in the biographies of Hazrat Umar Farooq. That a person came to Ameerul Momineen Hazrat Umar Farooq RA with the complaint of his son. And started saying that the son of Amirul Momineen has become disobedient. He harasses us a lot. You should make him a blocker or punish him so that he obeys and does not harass us. Ameerul Momineen called the boy and asked that your father is complaining. That you disobey him. And why is it that you torture him? Don't you know the rights of parents? The boy asked Amirul Mominin Amirul Mominin! Do children also have some rights over parents?
The Strange Incident of Hazrat Umar
Hazrat Umar Farooq said yes! The boy asked what are they? You said that the first right of a child is this. That the father should choose a good mother for him very thoughtfully. That is, he should marry a woman who is a believer, free, pious, virtuous, etc., so that a good generation can be prepared. Further rights are to say adhan in the child's ear after birth. Do Aqeeqah, give him a good meaningful name. Nurture him with halal sustenance. And educate him in a very good way. Teach him the manners of life. Teach him some skill. And then when he is young, get him married in a suitable place, etc.
When Umar Farooq RA mentioned all these rights, the boy started saying: Ameerul Momineen! My father did not give me any of these rights. My father married a magician. In which there was no such thing as faith and righteousness. When I was born, I was named Jaal, which is the name of a dung worm. And to this day people make fun of me because of that name. My father did not give me any education and did not train me. In such a way, it is obvious that I had to be disobedient. After hearing this cry of the boy, Umar Farooq rejected the father's request. And he said that if you have not fulfilled your duties, then why do you demand rights?
Accountability to Allah
From this incident we know that parents have certain rights of children. Parents should first understand these rights. And then make sure to pay them. If parents fail to pay these rights. So then one should be prepared to bear the suffering of disobedient children and be accountable to Allah. If parents understand the rights of their children and try to pay them in a correct manner, then, God willing, not only the parents will be relieved of their responsibilities. Rather, the best education of the children will also be done. These children will be the coolness of the eyes for the parents in this world, the source of good name and the comfort of life and will also be a source of charity for them in the hereafter.
Child Rearing and Parental Responsibilities
For a child, Allah Ta'ala has made their parents a shield for him. The duties that Allah Ta'ala has prescribed for children require that the children also share in the sorrows of their parents. They become silver and if they are not good, then the same children become bad souls for their parents, that's why it is said that the rights and duties that Allah has determined for the children, the same rights have been determined for the children.
If the children prove to be simple and complicated for the parents, then it becomes the duty of the parents to adopt the same procedure for their children as they reserved for the children. Parents and children are side by side.
If one of the children goes sick, then the parents are worried that their child is sick and how will he recover. If one or both of the parents fall ill, then the children go Vadu wonders how he will take care of his parents' health.
Children who are the darlings of their parents always pray for their mother and father that O Allah, heal our dear mother and father, remove their illness and restore them to health. Similarly. If the children fall ill, their parents recite the wish that, O Allah, no harm will come to our child, and O Allah, by Your grace, bring our child back to health as soon as possible.
Allah Ta'ala has set the rights of Allah Ta'ala on the children. Their requirement is that the children should treat their parents without any delay, even if they have to suffer so much. Take care of such a precious thing and whoever sees that their parents are feeling sick and weak and do not get along well with them, then they should go to the nearest medical center for complete treatment and get their parents treated.
Fundamental Rights of Children and Islamic Perspective
There are no two opinions about it, children are the builders of the nation and the future leaders and responsible. High education and good training of children is the reason for the formation of a righteous society. A healthy and strong plant can grow into a vigorous and tasty fruit and flower tree in the future.
At this time, the movement that is being seen regarding the rights of children in the whole world including the western countries, the sensitivity that intellectuals are showing in this regard, the awareness campaign that is being conducted by various NGOs and every year Regardless of the various laws that are being formulated in this regard, fourteen and a half hundred years ago, when humanity was wandering in the darkness of ignorance, at the same time the Prophet of Islam, peace and blessings be upon him, emphasized the value and status of children and their education and training.
Give those golden principles and guidelines that are the guiding light for the human race until the doomsday. Today's intellectuals and psychologists give importance to certain aspects of children's training after birth; but Islam has described in detail the responsibilities of parents and guardians step by step in terms of marriage life, choice of spouse, purity of lineage and training of children's body and soul. He also gave the same position and rank that other classes of mankind have.
The kind and loving behavior of the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) towards children is also a reflection of the position and rank of children in the society and also a torch for all of us. The importance of children's rights in Islam can be seen from the fact that Islam has started the rights of children even before their birth. Such a comprehensive coverage of children's rights is not found in any legal system of the world despite the search. We take a bird's eye look at some of the rights and duties of children granted by the religion of Islam.
Right to Life:
The fear of poverty and starvation used to be the motive of infanticide and ad al-binat during the Jahiliyyah period, the people of Jahiliyyah especially used to bury their girls alive, fearing that they would become a burden on them and weaken them economically and It will be difficult for them to manage them.
Islam has done the most important favor to children by giving them the right to life. In the eyes of Islam, the legal union of man and woman is not just a means of entertainment and fulfillment of needs, but it is the reason for the protection of the human race and its flourishing.
Therefore, Islam gives the child born as a result of this relationship the right to live, and it is the responsibility of the parents to accept his life happily and to ensure his survival. If we consider, today this evil has taken the name of birth control and planning.
The fear is the same as it was in the ancient times that "where will the newcomer get sustenance?" They also considered themselves as sustenance. But the verse of Surah Bani Israel (And do not kill your children, for fear of poverty, We provide for them and you too, surely killing them is a great crime) would completely demolish these economic foundations. Is. She clearly orders not to kill your children for fear of poverty. Non-killing doesn't just mean don't kill them after birth; Rather, it also means that you should not use abortion or contraception. The real provider will provide them with sustenance and with their blessings he will also provide sustenance to you.
Pedigree, Identity, Upbringing:
Islam gives a lot of importance to the protection of lineage and many orders of Shariat-e-Islamia depend on it. Allama Shatabi mentioned five purposes of Shariat in his famous Zamana Kitab al-Mawafqat:
1. Protection of religion
2. Protection of intellect
3. Protection of life
4. Protection of lineage
5. Protection of property.
Among them, one of the major goals of religion is the protection of lineage, which is secured through marriage. Islamic Shari'ah has made an excellent arrangement to give the servants of Allah their rights through protection of lineage; So that a child is not deprived of the love of his parents, he gets equal affection from his father and affection from his mother, he can be trained well. At the same time, there should be people among his close relatives who can encourage the correct behavior of the child and give timely warnings about the shortcomings.
If this concept is ignored, what kind of future will the child be able to shape, who will make him understand good and evil, where will he be given quality education and training, he will have the support of a brother and the feeling of a sister's grief. Who will bring Of course, because of these deprivations, he will show rebellion in the society and will make everyone and Knox the target of his ignorance.
After the name and genealogy, now is the stage of raising the child. In this regard, the religion of Islam has declared in clear words that the mother of the child, even if she is divorced, cannot be acquitted of the child who drinks milk. Rather, duties are imposed on her by the Holy Shariat.
After divorce, Allah did not leave the woman free, because in such situations, if the woman is left free according to her nature, even a wrong decision due to strained relations. and the child may be lost as a result of this wrong decision, so Allah Ta'ala lays down rules for children and obligates the mother not to adopt any behavior in such situations that will harm the child.
It is the mother's duty to breastfeed the child for two whole years; Because Allah is most aware that it is necessary for a child to drink milk for a period of two years in terms of health. It is in Sahih Ibn Khuzimah that when the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was shown Hell, he said something. Saw women whose breasts were being scratched and bitten by snakes. You asked what is the matter? It was told that these are the women who did not breastfeed their children. (Sahih al-Turghib and al-Tarhib) Yes, if a mother does not breastfeed under compulsion, then she will not be entitled to this promise.
Education and Training:
Parents have the responsibility in relation to their children to provide them with good food, good clothes and other items of life for a good life, and also make full arrangements for their religious education and Islamic training. Make children benefit from your experiences and observations about its downsides so that they can achieve success in every field of life. According to experts, a child goes through two stages of training after birth:
(1). The period of childhood, this period is from the age of one year to seven years. In this period, the child does not have the ability to receive direct training, because he is unaware of his world during this period.
(2). The period from seven to fourteen years of age. In this period, the intellect gradually grows and is ready for intellectual activity. In this period, a person can learn and receive education and training.
Training in the first period should not be direct and at this age the child should not be forced to do anything or order anything; Rather, he should be provided with a good environment, a pure atmosphere and suitable friends; so that he continues to learn and learn literature from his environment and society, this is the age in which the first foundation of morality is laid and he is good about his environment. Stores memories and appropriate behaviors.
In the second period, the child should not be left free and his mistakes should not be overlooked, but he should be restrained from his indecency, taught discipline and should not waste time in excessive games, etc., Ibadah. And he should be attracted towards good deeds. This is the reason why the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Command your children to pray when they are seven years old and beat them for prayer when they are ten years old and separation. I am (Abu Dawud) sleeping among them in these ages, although prayer is not obligatory on them; But in order to get used to it, it is being urged to make them prayer from now on.
Justice and Equality:
Regarding the rights of children, the last and most important thing that parents should keep in mind in relation to their children is that parents should not leave the foot of justice and fairness on the occasion of the distribution of anything between children. He should be made the guardian of justice and justice so that they feel its virtue, become familiar with its importance, consider it necessary for their lives and society and avoid injustice, oppression and all kinds of discrimination.
Because something in the life of children It is not small, so it is very important to take care of even the smallest thing in the implementation of justice. My mother said, "I will not agree to it until you make the Messenger of Allah, may God bless him and grant him peace, a witness to it." So my father came to the service of the Messenger of Allah ï·º so that he would make him a witness to the gift given to me. The Messenger of Allah ï·º inquired:
"Have you gifted all your boys like this?"
My father said: "No."
The Messenger of Allah (ï·º) heard this and said: "Fear Allah and treat your children with justice."
However, my father took that gift back from me.
In another hadith, it is narrated that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, asked my father: "Do you like that all boys are equal in obedience and good behavior?"
Said: Yes, why not?
He (peace be upon him) said: "Then don't do that."
That is, if you do not act with justice and equality among children, then all children will not be the same in their good behavior and obedience to you, but the children who will feel deprived and are not cared for by their parents. They will feel justice, the spirit of disobedience to parents will emerge in them.
Abstract:
Along with educational, economic and social needs of children, psychological needs are also very important and require attention of parents. Parents should not only pay attention to the educational and economic needs of the child, but also understand the social and psychological needs of the children and make appropriate arrangements to satisfy these needs. Talk to them, be kind to them, ask about their problems and make sure to solve them, etc.
A tragedy of the modern era is that parents do not have time for their children, while in the olden days, parents used to give time to children, tell them stories and educate them intellectually. In this way, the psychological needs of the children were also fulfilled and education and training were also done.
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